#1 Muffin: Coffee Shops
Friends,
Nearly every day I stop into a coffee shop on my walk from the Metro to the office. I tend to patronize this one place that smells like butter (in spite of the fact that I never actually buy a pastry, because I am nothing if not a creature of habit and therefore eat breakfast before leaving the house, every single day). Even though I'm strictly a brewed-coffee gal, I gravitate toward places that have a nice selection of baked goods, especially if they smell incredible.
What's the test of a decent coffee shop bakery? At a bare minimum, when you pick up a box of pastries for a morning meeting, the sticky buns shouldn't already be cold, dry, and tooth-threateningly hard. A marginally stricter standard might require the goods to be baked or at least half-heartedly warmed up on site, even if they originate at a soulless commissary making faux-artisanal food for celebrity chefs. I'm guessing that for people who hew closer to paleo than I, the availability of something low- or slow-carb is dispositive (and by the way, you'll likely want to subscribe to a different newsletter if that's your vibe).
The truest test is the muffin, but too often, coffee shops fail. "Why the muffin?" you might be asking. "Muffins are only a sad in-between amalgamation of pancake batter and quickbread." (Unfair!) "Muffins are overpriced." (Very possible.) "Muffins are boring." (Only boring people get bored.) "What's the difference between a muffin and a cupcake?" (Tabling for future discussion).
Muffins are the benchmark for two reasons, both pragmatic. First: muffins are, quite honestly, hard to screw up. They're so easy that even a half-asleep coffee shop employee on the opening shift at 4 a.m. can make them (though not so simple that they don't demand a weekly exposition by yours truly). If you buy and are disappointed by an early morning muffin, it's not on you. Failed coffee shop muffins are a good indicator that something has gone terribly wrong in the back of the house: E-Z Bake Oven problems, maybe, or check again on that commissary supplier... The second reason for muffin superiority: have you ever even tried to eat a crispy croissant while wearing black? No? I'll wait right here. Look, you're back and covered in tiny shards of laminated pastry. You look like vermin's wet dream. Muffins wouldn't do you like that.
So why do we turn our backs on the muffin? Why do muffins linger, neglected and unloved, while almond croissants inexplicably fly off the shelf? Are muffins too easy? Too simple? Too... American? Ugh. It pains me that muffins are so frequently maligned as dense, fibrous, and flavorless, or - worse - cloying and damp, while know-nothing coffee shop patrons boost demand for prefab sticky buns and reheated breakfast sandwiches.
Even a plain muffin — and I'm the first to admit that this week's offering is just such a recipe — can be delicious. Buttery, moist, and satisfying, they are excellent warm or cold, plain or toasted. If it weren't for the fact that my oven is so freakin' tiny, I would have baked a double batch. As it is, they're half gone already.
More soon,
HBW
Captain, Team Muffin
Blueberry Muffins
adapted from The Joy of Cooking
2 cups all-purpose flour*
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon kosher salt (or 1/2 t. table salt)
6 tablespoons melted butter**
2 large eggs
1 cup milk
1/2 cup sugar
1 cup blueberries (frozen or fresh)
Preheat the oven to 350 F. Grease your muffin tin, use a non-stick tin, or use paper liners. (Even if you're using paper liners, it's still a good idea to grease the top of the tin a bit.)
Whisk together the flour, baking powder, and salt in a large bowl. Thoroughly whisk the butter, eggs, milk and sugar in a medium bowl. Add the liquid ingredients to the dry ingredients and mix briefly, using a spatula. Do not over mix! The batter will still appear a little lumpy. Add the blueberries and mix again, gently. Divide batter among muffin cups and bake for 18-20 minutes, slightly longer if you're using frozen fruit.
They're done when they are golden brown and a skewer inserted in the center of a muffin comes out clean. Rest in pan for a few minutes, then remove from the tin.
Notes
* You can substitute whole grain flour, cup-for-cup, for up to 1 cup of the all-purpose flour. Just replace with an equal amount of barley, whole wheat, whole wheat pastry, or spelt flour, or a combination — I haven't tested this with gluten free flours so can't make any promises there.
** Joy advises that you can use anywhere from 1/4-1/2 cup (4 - 8 tablespoons) of either butter or vegetable oil. Use the larger amount if you want the muffins to keep at room temperature for a longer period of time. Obviously, butter is more delicious.